Discover Internal Family Systems (IFS) for trauma healing. Explore the “no bad parts” approach and restore wholeness with Dr. Richard Schwartz, who speaks clearly about IFS and its healing potential in the video below.
After the video, you will find a summary of key points and ideas that help understand IFS and apply it.
Have you ever felt like you’re at war with yourself? One part of you wants to achieve a goal, while another seems determined to sabotage your efforts. Maybe you have an inner critic that constantly puts you down. What if I told you that these “parts” aren’t your enemies, but rather aspects of yourself trying to protect you? This is the core concept behind Internal Family Systems (IFS), a transformative model developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz.
Dr. Schwartz, known as Dick to friends, earned his Ph.D. in marriage and family therapy. He is the author of “No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model.” He challenges the traditional view of a singular mind, inviting us to welcome every part of who we are. Through understanding and compassion, we can heal deep wounds and find inner peace. Let’s explore the fascinating world of IFS and how it can help you on your journey to wholeness.
The “No Bad Parts” Philosophy
The idea that every part of us, even the most destructive ones, has a positive intention is central to IFS. It’s a concept that can be difficult to accept, especially when dealing with aspects of ourselves we dislike or even despise. Dick Schwartz explains that this understanding took him years of working with clients, including those with parts that had done terrible things.
If you can approach these parts with curiosity, asking why they behave the way they do, you’ll begin to understand their motivations. Often, these parts are acting out of a need to protect you or other vulnerable parts of yourself. They may be stuck in past traumas, replaying old patterns in an attempt to keep you safe. This shift in perspective, from demonising our inner demons to understanding their purpose, is a key element of IFS.
Dick Schwartz’s journey to developing IFS began with his work as a family therapist. Initially, he believed that reorganising family dynamics was the key to solving problems. However, he encountered clients with bulimia who continued to struggle despite family therapy. This led him to explore their internal worlds.
These clients spoke of inner “parts” – a critic, a part that felt worthless, and a part that sought comfort in binging. Dick Schwartz initially saw these as metaphors. But he soon realised that these parts felt like distinct personalities with their own autonomy. This revelation led him to explore his own internal system and eventually develop the IFS model.
A Turning Point: Understanding Self-Harm
One of the most significant moments in Dick Schwartz’s development of IFS came when working with a client who self-harmed. Initially, he tried to control the part that caused her to cut herself. However, this approach backfired, leading to a more severe act of self-harm. It was then that Dick Schwartz realised that fighting against these parts was not the answer.
Instead, he approached the part with curiosity, asking why it engaged in self-harm. He learned that this part was protecting her from the trauma of childhood sexual abuse by helping her dissociate from her body. This understanding shifted Dick Schwartz’s perspective from judgment to appreciation. By conveying this appreciation to the part, he witnessed it break down in tears, as it had only ever been demonised. This experience reinforced the idea that even the most destructive parts have positive intentions and are capable of transformation.
Dick Schwartz’s work with sex offenders at the Onarga Academy further challenged the notion of “bad parts.” He acknowledges that this is where many people draw the line, struggling to believe that even a part that has committed such heinous acts could have a positive intention.
Through the IFS process, Dick Schwartz helped these offenders connect with the parts responsible for their actions. In one instance, a client’s sex-offending part revealed that it stemmed from his own childhood abuse. Feeling powerless, this part sought to protect the system by taking on the energy of the abuser. This part became stuck with the desire to hurt vulnerable people. IFS offers a way to release these burdens, transforming the part into its naturally valuable state.
The Myth of the Mono-Mind
IFS challenges the “myth of the mono-mind,” the belief that we have a single, unified consciousness. This idea is deeply ingrained in our culture, often leading us to fear the idea of having multiple personalities. Dick Schwartz emphasizes that these parts are not the same as the delusional voices of schizophrenia, but that these parts are ubiquitous and valuable aspects of the human mind.
Each part has unique talents and resources to offer. However, trauma and difficult life experiences can force these parts into destructive roles. By recognising and understanding our internal system, we can break free from the limitations of the mono-mind myth and embrace our multifaceted selves.
Let’s consider the inner critic, a common part that many people struggle with. It constantly judges and berates us, making us feel inadequate and holding us back from pursuing our goals. It’s hard to imagine that this part could have a positive function.
Using a hypothetical example, Dick Schwartz guides us to focus on the critical voice, find it in the body, and acknowledge the feelings it evokes. The next step involves getting the parts that hate the critic to step aside, making space for curiosity. We might ask it what it’s afraid would happen if it didn’t constantly criticise us. The answer often reveals a protective intention. It might fear that we’d get hurt, be judged, or fail, leading to abandonment.
The Process of Unburdening
If you could heal the part it protects so it wasn’t such a threat, would this part have to keep doing this?
Most of the time, the inner critic would step down. Then, the question would be, what do you want to do instead of being a critic? The answer is often surprising – the critic would like to be a cheerleader, encouraging and supporting you to get out into the world.
Here’s a look at the process:
Focus on the part that feels hurt
Convey compassion for that younger, hurt part
Connect with the younger part and let them know you are here for them
Ask the part about a past event that made her feel so bad
Help the part through that moment
The process is about unburdening that part, so it feels less vulnerable and the critic can shift into its more positive role.
Evidence-Based Approach
IFS is not just a theoretical model; it’s an evidence-based approach supported by research. The effectiveness of IFS has been demonstrated in several outcome studies, leading to its recognition by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), a federal agency. This recognition underscores the rigorous research that backs the IFS model.
One notable study, conducted at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston, involved patients with rheumatoid arthritis. Patients who received six months of IFS therapy showed significant improvements in their arthritis symptoms, as well as reductions in depression and anxiety, compared to a control group. Blinded physicians confirmed the findings. These findings suggest that IFS can positively impact both physical and mental well-being.
The Three Discoveries of IFS
Dick Schwartz highlights three key discoveries he made in developing IFS:
Even our most destructive parts have protective intentions.
Everyone has a Self that cannot be damaged.
Parts take on burdens that are not their own.
These discoveries form the foundation of the IFS model and guide the process of healing and transformation.
In the rheumatoid arthritis study, the over-caretaker parts played a significant role. These parts were constantly taking care of others, neglecting their own needs. When asked about their protective intentions, these parts revealed beliefs about their value.
They feared that their only worth came from serving others, reflecting societal messages that many women internalize. They also sought to protect parts that feared losing the love of others if they didn’t constantly provide care. This highlights the importance of addressing these underlying beliefs and helping these parts find a healthier balance.
The Power of Exiles and Protectors
The term “exile” is powerful in IFS. It refers to the parts of ourselves that we have locked away in our inner basements, the parts that hold our deepest wounds and traumas. Before they were hurt, these exiles were playful inner children with boundless creativity, innocence, and a desire for connection.
However, when these parts experience trauma, they become burdened with intense emotions like fear, worthlessness, and abandonment. These burdens become overwhelming. As a result, we try to distance ourselves from these parts, unknowingly locking away our own vitality and joy. IFS helps us to retrieve these exiled parts, heal their wounds, and reintegrate them into our system.
When we have a lot of exiles, we feel vulnerable and the world feels dangerous. This forces other parts into protector roles, taking them away from their natural roles.
Protectors manage your life and preempt anything that might trigger these exiles. Critics are one class of manager.
Then there are parts that react after the fact, after an exile has been triggered, and these flames of emotion explode out of your inner basement and threaten to consume you.
Parts will scramble to dissociate you or scramble to binge on something to get higher than the flames. These are firefighters.
Respecting the Inner Ecology
Dick Schwartz learned early on that it’s essential to respect the inner ecology of our systems. By bypassing protectors and going straight to the exiles, he triggered protector backlash, leading to negative consequences for his clients.
As Dick Schwartz learned more and more, clients would often get into an accident right after leaving the office.
In response to the accidents and negative outcomes, Dick Schwartz started to ask his clients where he was going wrong. In doing so, Dick Schwartz learned the importance of respecting the protectors. Now, the approach is to get the protector’s permission to go further.
IFS views our parts as sacred beings, each with its own unique body and energy. While not literal bodies, these forms manifest in our internal experience. For example, a worthless part might describe its burden as a “fireball in my gut” or a “weight on my shoulders.”
This recognition allows us to connect with our parts on a deeper level. The key is to ask questions inside. Through compassion and understanding, we can facilitate the release of these burdens, allowing our parts to transform and reclaim their natural states.
The possibility of permanent unburdening is a compelling aspect of IFS. Dick Schwartz shares his own experiences with this process, particularly in relation to feelings of worthlessness stemming from his childhood.
Growing up in the shadow of his successful father, Dick Schwartz struggled to meet his expectations, leading to deep-seated feelings of inadequacy. In response, he developed protector parts that were arrogant, angry, and dissociative. Through IFS, he was able to access and heal his exiled parts, releasing the burdens of worthlessness they carried. This led to a lasting shift in his sense of self, allowing him to lead from a place of authenticity and compassion.
Self-Leadership: The Centerpiece of IFS
The centerpiece of IFS is self-leadership. Discovering our Self and being Self-led is different from having a unitary vision of the mind. As Dick Schwartz worked with clients, he noticed that when they were able to create space between themselves and their parts, a different quality of presence emerged.
Then this person instead of hating the critic would be curious, calm, confident, and might even have compassion.
Dick Schwartz calls this the Self with a capital S, and has identified 8 C qualities of Self. It cannot be damaged, and it knows how to heal both inside and in relationships. The Self is what people meditate to get to, or Buddha nature.
Accessing Your Inner Wisdom: The 8 C’s of Self-Leadership
The qualities of the Self include:
Curiosity
Calm
Confidence
Compassion
Creativity
Clarity
Courage
Connectedness
These qualities are already present within each of us, waiting to be accessed.
Find a politician that triggers you and put them in a room by themselves. You are outside the room looking at them through a window.
What happens in your body? What thoughts and emotions?
Then pick one of those protectors and focus on it. Notice how you feel towards it. Ask any other parts that don’t like it to just relax inside. With that much instruction, people often start to feel open to this protector.
Parts Blending: When Parts Take Over
One challenge in IFS is that parts can blend with our Self, clouding our judgment and distorting our perceptions. When we make a mistake, we might experience a rush of shame, completely identifying with the critic and feeling utterly worthless. This blending can last for a while.
Part blending often occurs in reactive relationship dynamics. When triggered, it becomes difficult to access that curious, open Self. In these moments, we feel hijacked by a part. It can be healing after you’ve been hijacked to describe how a part of me felt this way.
When working with couples, IFS therapists invite a “U-turn” in their focus. Instead of battling each other, they stop, focus inward, and notice the parts that have been doing the talking. By getting to know these parts and unblending from them, they can communicate from Self to Self, leading to more productive and compassionate interactions.
A Real-Life Example: IFS in Marriage
Dick Schwartz provides a personal example of how IFS has helped him and his wife navigate conflict. During a recent disagreement, he recognised that his “mother” part had been triggered, causing him to resent his wife and view her negatively. This part made a compelling case for why he was right and she was wrong.
Recognising this blending, Dick Schwartz took a break to connect with the triggered part. He was able to separate himself from the protector part. By doing so, he could acknowledge the validity of his wife’s perspective. He returned to the conversation. He expressed how his part felt criticised and uncared for, and he apologised for his reactive behaviour.
The Self as a Field: A Vision of Connectedness
IFS explores the nature of the Self, pondering whether it’s more like a particle, a wave, or a field. What if the Self is a field? And what if when we’re in this field of the Self, we’re resonating with the Self in everyone? This is the way Dick Schwartz sees Self.
When you enter the Self, mystics have entered that for years, often through psychedelics or meditating. When you enter that field, you feel enormous connectedness and sense that we aren’t really different.
Dick Schwartz hopes that IFS will change the way people understand themselves and each other. By recognising the inherent worth and potential for transformation within each part, we can foster greater compassion, understanding, and connection. If everyone knew of their undamageable, intact, 8C Self, the world would be a better place.
Dick Schwartz imagines a world where the more you love your parts that drive you crazy, the more you can love people who resemble those parts in the same way. IFS isn’t the only thing that can make a profound change. But it’s one of many things that are starting to become available that could make a profound change and human interacting.
